Different people experience infertility differently. There are some who grieve, but move relatively smoothly into acceptance of

How does Infertility Make you Feel

Are you one of the ones who fairly easily accepted your infertility or did your rail against the injustice feeling an intense, painful, enveloping loss?

adoption or a child-free life. For others, infertility remains for years an aching wound-perhaps getting smaller and scabbing over, but always present. And then there are those in between where the pain is present, but usually manageable with the occasional pity-party and glass of wine.  Which one are you? Do you share any of the following feelings about your infertility?

  Infertility Feels Like_______:

  • I’m less of a woman (or man).
  • I’m a jealous _itch because I am sick and tired of hearing about other people’s kids.
  • My body betrayed me.
  • I’m a failure to my husband who wants kids so badly.
  • I’m a failure to my parent and in-laws who desperately want a grandchild.
  • Constantly being frustrated at the constant hassles of infertility (doctor’s appointment, taking off from work, shots, timed sex, etc.)
  • Being angry at God for giving me this huge desire to be a parent, but making it so damn hard.
  • Being intensely sad that I’ll probably never get to see the mixing of my husband and my genes reflected in our children.
  • Being angry at being told that Darwin says I’m an evolutionary mistake or that God would get me pregnant if I was supposed to be a mother.
  • Being aggravated at constant media (books, TV, movies) implications that only biology makes a true family, and that the delivery of a baby is what makes a parent a parent. (I despise delivery room scenes to a degree I cannot properly express.)
  • Being sad that my not-terribly-healthy parents might not get to know their grandchild(ren) and vice versa because infertility is making it take so long to have children.
  • I’m an abnormal freak.
  • Being tired of the loss of personal control and ownership of the story of how we became parents.

How does infertility make you feel? Take the time to leave a comment to try to explain infertility to those who have been blessed to never experience it and probably don’t even realize how fortunate they really are.

Image credit:  patricio villarroel bórquez

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